Grow Up

"Grow up. There's no room for the truth on the internet."

Self defense

"I only shave my legs often because if I crash on my bike, I don't want the paramedics to touch hairy legs."

"It could also be like a defense mechanism against rapists... you know, like a porcupine."

She's the Best

"Then hop in that Cannondale and head SW young man and don't stop until you are there. She's simply the best... lady like her won't last long on the open market. I may ride with you if you go to lead the way."

-- @TakeaBike

... Party in the Back?

"You married a man with a mullet? C'mon! Especially a man with a curly mullet?!"

Oh, C'mon!

"I see some people on campus who I want to stop and say 'oh c'mon. You're making it too easy.'"

Moral of the Story

"Shit. I still had my ex as my emergency contact. That's all kinds of bad."

"What did we learn?"

"Never put your SO as your emergency contract; always put your gay best friend."

For Being a Girl...

"You know, for being a girl with a vag, you're kind of a dick."